One minute you were here. One minute we were arguing over how quickly I could figure out my life as an adult, over things I can't even remember the significance of now. The next minute I got that phone call, the one telling me you were lying in a hospital bed. The next minute I was internally screaming a thousand "I'm sorrys" into the deafening silence of your room.
It's Mother's Day again and I don't think it's ever going to get easier. I hope I'm wrong. Maybe one day when I hold my own babies in my arms, I'll celebrate how I've come full circle into my own. Maybe one day I'll sit my children down and show them our home videos of you, let them hear that voice I wish was still on the other end of the line...
We don't talk about you. I don't think any of us can really, but I know we all think of you every single day. We all think of you.
We think about your laugh. The laugh that ended in watery eyes and gasping for breath. Usually not just yours.
We think about your smile. The smile that you hated to show in pictures even though it was such a beautiful feature.
We think about your strength. How is it possible that the strongest person I know was the first of us to lose her fight?
We do think about you, on this day and every day, you're in our thoughts. We love you always.
Happy Mother's Day to all of you amazing moms out there! You have no idea how deeply you are touching your children's hearts, but believe me, you're there to stay. Wishing you all the most wonderful of Mother's Days!
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